Heart to Regret
by Azuria Tayutama
Summary: She was going to die; she couldn't even escape her own death, but Luka would make sure she would live the happiest days of her life. Luka x Miku. Negitoro.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:** This will be a short story. You can expect it to have around 3-5 chapters. At least, I'll be sure to finish it.

That's all I have to say.

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**Heart to Regret**

She was only 16 years old. She was too young. She still had many things to do, she still had dreams to make come true, she still had to find love, get married and have children. She still had a life to live. It wasn't fair. She couldn't die. Nobody deserved such a thing. If only people could live their complete life, if only they could all die at an old age, but not everyone had that chance. One thousand hundreds of people died every day. It could be from illness, incident, murder, suicide, old age... And unfortunately, nobody could guess how they would die and from what.

Megurine Luka exhaled deeply. Being a nurse was harder than she thought. She wished she would be ready for that kind of situation, but she wasn't. Her hands were shaking and her throat felt terribly dry. Her heart was even beating from anxiety. _Calm down. Take a deep breath. Don't let your emotions get to you. Stay strong and meet with your new patient._ Her boss wanted her to take care of _her_, because he knew how caring and loving she was towards children. But this time was different. The young girl had breast cancer, and she was at her final phase. The tumors had spread through other parts of her body and organs, making it incurable. She was going to die. She couldn't even escape her death. There was nothing they could do anymore. It was unfair. Completely unfair.

_Put a smile on your face, introduce_ _yourself and pretend everything is fine._

She took the doorknob and slowly opened the door with a gentle, cracking sound. She then met with big, vibrant teal eyes. The young girl, sitting on the bed, was absolutely breath taking. She looked like a doll. Long twintail, a smooth flawless face, a petite figure and long eyelashes. She stared at her in awe, completely stunned, unable to even utter a word. They looked at each other for a long time before Luka finally decided to break the silence to try and make things less awkward for both of them. "Hello, I'm Megurine Luka. If you can't tell from the uniform, I'm a nurse. I'm here to take care of you." She spoke softly and approached her. She looked pale and tired. It was pitiful. "Hatsune Miku, is it?" She asked with a frown, wanting to make sure she got it right.

The tealette gave her a faint smile and nodded. She seemed a bit shy. "Hi," she replied softly. "...can I say how pretty you are, miss?" She spoke in an exhausted voice, before looking at the window at her right.

Luka was slightly taken aback. She certainly didn't expect this. "Um... thanks. You're very cute yourself..." She answered uncertainly. The girl wasn't sad; she could tell. People of her age would usually pass their time crying. Her eyes weren't even red or swollen. "You can call me Luka. We'll see each other every day from now on, so let's get used to call each other by our first name, alright?" She put a hand on her forehead to make sure she didn't have any fever. It wasn't hot. In fact, it was surprisingly cold.

"Luka is a pretty name." Miku muttered and looked up at her. "Can I ask something?"

The young woman stopped her careful examination and gave her a nod. She should have refused her boss' offer. She knew she would most likely grow attached to her. It was often like that. She liked being around teenagers and children. She liked them. She dreamed to have some.

"They refused to tell me, but what's my estimated time? You probably know it, right? Can you tell me, please?"

Luka felt like we just gave her a stab in the heart. She knew it; she knew how much time she had left. It hurt to think about it. She was so young. She didn't want to tell her, but she had no other choice; she had the right to know, she couldn't refuse it to her. She took a shaky breath. "A few months or...weeks." She admitted and looked at her reactions closely. Her face was expressionless. She didn't even bat an eyelash. Luka didn't understand. Anyone would be terrified; anyone would start crying and beg God for not letting them die.

Instead, Miku heaved a sigh and let out a weak giggle. "It's a shame. All my life, I dreamed of falling in love, but it never once happened. It might sound weird or childish, but my last wish is to fall in love. I want to know that feeling; I want to experience it..." She murmured with a soft smile. "But I guess it won't happen. It's honestly disappointing..."

The pinkette couldn't believe what she was hearing. She wasn't sad because she was going to die, but because she wanted to experience love, because she wanted to know what it was like. Most children would dream about meeting their favorite singer or going at the vacation of their dream, but this girl's wish was simply to fall in love. "Everything is possible. There are charming young men around your age here. Maybe you could meet them and see how things will go." She suggested gently.

"Don't give me false hope. I know it won't happen. Have you already fallen in love before?" She inquired with curiosity in her voice.

Luka was shocked. She certainly didn't expect one of their first conversations to be about love. It was so unusual. "I...had a few relationships, but they were nothing serious. It's not worth telling you about it." She explained to her.

Miku nodded faintly and ran her fingers in her teal hair. "Then, do you believe in love at first sight?" She asked a bit absently. She seemed to be lost in her thoughts.

The young woman slowly shook her head. "I don't think it's possible. Falling in love with someone without knowing them is absurd." She spoke honestly. A lot of people could confuse physical attraction with love, but it clearly wasn't the same thing.

The tealette immediately got angry. Her fists clenched and her eyebrow furrowed. "That's not true! It's possible! I think it only takes eye contact before knowing you belong to that person! You want to get to know them and your heart starts beating like crazy when you talk to them. The simplest touches are electrifying and looking at them is enough to take your breath away. That's how I see it..."

Luka knew love wasn't like in fairy tales, but she certainly didn't want to break her dreams. She smiled at her. "You're romantic, aren't you?" She asked a bit playfully. Romance wasn't as beautiful as people thought. It was also one of the most painful feelings.

Miku chuckled while a light blush formed on her cheeks. She met with the nurse's crystal blue eyes and have her the most charming smile she could make. "I hope to have a boyfriend as romantic as I am!" She exclaimed cheerfully, before lowering her head and biting on her lower lip. "But it really won't happen... I wish it wouldn't just be a dream."

Luka felt upset. It was like a pang in the heart. It seriously hurt. She didn't know that girl yet, but she did feel her pain. There was also something else, a comforting feeling, but she couldn't tell what it was exactly. She should probably change the topic. "Um... How are you feeling, Miku? Does it hurt somewhere? Do you feel sick?" She asked, knowing how important it was to know how her patients were feeling.

"I'm fine. I'm just feeling extremely tired, and my bones hurt a bit, but it's nothing to worry about." The tealette admitted and laid down on her back. "Someone made me took pills a few moments ago, so the pain should be gone soon."

Luka nodded in acknowledgement. At least, at the moment, the pain wasn't so bad, but she knew it would eventually get worse. "I'll listen to your heart now. I'm sorry if it's cold." She whispered and used the stethoscope on her heart, right on her pale skin. She could feel the young girl shudder and wince slightly. Her heart was beating a bit fast, but there wasn't anything abnormal. She looked at her and she finally realized how close their faces were. She could feel the petite girl's breathing tickling her skin. It made her heart skip a beat as a shiver travelled up her spine.

"You're really pretty..." Miku said in a murmur before stretching her arm and caressing her cheek with the tip of her fingers.

Luka immediately stepped back as if she received an electric shock. She looked at her new patient with wide eyes. She didn't quite understand what was going on, but this feeling was more than familiar. She stayed silent and slowly looked away. "I'll...come back tomorrow, alright? My day is over, but someone else will be here for you." She murmured, still a bit shocked. She headed to the door and gave her a motherly smile. "See you tomorrow, Miku." She waved her hand at her. Without waiting for an answer, she opened the door and closed it behind her.

She leaned against the wall and exhaled deeply. She needed to calm down. Her heart was beating hard into her chest and she felt comforting warmth invading her whole body. She didn't exactly know what she was feeling, but being close to her felt almost suffocating, as if it was taking her breath away.

_Ah... what's wrong with me. I just met her and yet..._

A sudden hand on her shoulder made her jump in surprise. She met with icy blue eyes. A mysterious smirk parted the lips of the woman standing in front of her. It was Lily. She was her best friend. She was also a nurse here. "Lily, what are you doing?" She asked with a frown.

The blonde-haired beauty shrugged and pointed at the door behind her. "That Miku is cute, isn't she? She's totally your type." She stated and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

Luka opened her mouth to pretest, but then closed it after a moment of hesitation. She knew Lily was right. She was her type and she hated herself for having noticed it. She pushed her away. "She's younger than me, Lily, and it's not like anything will happen." She rolled her eyes, not believing that her friend suggested such an appropriate thing.

The tall blonde laughed and playfully pinched one of her buttocks with a grin, which earned a gasp and a glare from her. "Well I've heard of a few patients having crush on you. Our boss even thinks you're too sexy to be a nurse. You're attracting attention. I understand why." She winked at her playfully.

"You do know that most people crushing on me are lonely, old, perverted men? This isn't even funny. The look they're giving me sometimes is seriously creepy." Luka said, arms crossed, as they walked to her car. They finished the job at the same hour today and they both agreed on going at the pinkette's house. "And besides, I'm not interested in love anymore after what happened..." She whispered a bit absently.

"Hun, don't think too much about it. She wasn't even worth it." Lily said, knowing how much the whole thing affected her. Luka's ex-girlfriend kept on telling her that she loved her and yet almost every night she was going to see some guy. She had been seeing both Luka and him at the same time.

The pinkette nodded. She unlocked the doors of her car as they both entered inside. "I...I think I still like her, Lily..." She murmured and started the engine. "I often think about her and thinking too much about what happened hurts me. Love is nothing but great. I want to avoid it as much as possible. I even tend to fall for straight girls. I seriously think I'll stay single all my life."

Lily ruffled her blonde hair, exasperated. "I'm pretty sure you'll find someone good enough for you one day. Just be patient."

Luka sighed. It made her think of her new patient who wanted to experience love. She did believe it was the worst feeling anyone could feel.

"She's a strong girl, isn't she?" Lily suddenly asked with a soft smile, looking at the deformed landscape.

The pink-haired woman knew she was talking about Miku. She really was strong -to the point where it worried her a bit. She would honestly be freaking out if she were to learn she would die in a few months or weeks. "I don't understand her. She should be sad, she should be crying and yet she wasn't even shocked when I told her she doesn't have much time left. I don't get it..."

Lily pursed her lips. "The boss didn't tell you? The poor girl doesn't have an easy life. I don't know the details, but her parents refused to bring her to the hospital. They waited at the last moment, they waited until the cancer became worse. Not only that; she apparently doesn't have friends. Maybe she's not happy with her life, meaning that dying wouldn't even bother her..." She murmured in thought. It was the only reason she could think of.

Luka felt like we just gave her a punch in the stomach that took her breath away. She was completely shocked and upset. It couldn't be true. Why would parents do such a thing? It was so heartless. She was their daughter. It was making her insanely angry. And she couldn't actually believe a girl like her didn't even have any friends. She looked so sweet and she was cute. "I can't believe this..." She whispered, gripping the steering wheel strongly. She didn't know why she felt that mad about it. She didn't even know her. Maybe she was just that caring.

"Calm down, Luka. Honestly you're too caring over people you don't even know." Lily whispered and gave her a reassuring smile. "I think our boss wanted you to take care of her because he knows you would do everything to make her happy before she ends her days. You should try your best to make her last weeks as enjoyable as possible. I think you can do it..."

The pinkette parked her car in her garage and closed her eyes for a few seconds, trying to process the information. "I don't think I can..." She murmured sadly, her breath caught in her throat. It was too much to take in. "But I'll try my best. I'll show her the happiest days she will ever have, but I'm afraid to get attached to her. If I do, it'll make me suffer. I wouldn't want her to leave..." She spoke in a broken voice, tears pricking her eyes. It was just so sad and unfair.

Lily got out of the car and rolled her eyes. "You're way too sentimental, Luka. It's almost pitiful. You're worrying too much. You've always been like this."

The pink-haired woman heaved a sigh. Her friend was right. She was too much of a worrywart, but she couldn't help it. It was how she was. She walked to her house and entered inside with a smirking Lily. The pinkette immediately regretted having brought her here. As expected, she was suddenly pulled into an embrace. "Lily, no. I didn't invite you over for that reason. Please, get off me already." She growled at her.

"Come on, it's been a while since we've last done it." The blonde purred out and traveled hasty kisses on her neck. "I miss having you in my arms, I miss our good sex."

Luka grimaced at the familiar bitter perfume invading her nostrils. She didn't know what her scent was, but she certainly didn't like it, nor did she like the rough kisses on her skin. "Lily, I said we would stop this. Get off before I get angry." She said sternly. "And besides, I'm in my week, so it's out of the question." They weren't even lovers in the first place. They used to do that regularly before, but the pinkette had enough of it.

Lily sighed heavily and pulled away with a bored look on her face. "Fine, I haven't had sex in a while. I'm starting to get frustrated." She grumbled and comfortably sat on the sofa, her legs on the table.

Luka didn't even know why she was her best friend. She was so inappropriate, impolite and perverted. "You have a girlfriend, Lily." She reminded her and went into the kitchen, taking a glass of water.

"You mean Gumi? Nah I broke up with her." She replied neutrally and stretched her arms. "She refused to have sex."

The pinkette almost chocked on her water when she heard the news. She couldn't believe it. "You broke up with her only for that reason!? Lily, for God's sake! Gumi really loved you! She was always talking to me about you with a happy grin on her face. You're such a jerk! You're worse than a guy!" She exclaimed angrily. The whole thing was almost giving her a migraine. "I'm going to sleep. I'm tired. And no, you're not sleeping on the same bed as I. Stay on the sofa." She ordered her as she could her some chuckles from her. She really hated her behavior sometimes. It was making her sick. It was one of the reasons why she rejected her when she confessed to her some years ago. She wasn't her type. She was too crude.

She entered her large bedroom. Everything was clean and refined. She removed her clothes and slipped under her silk covers. She was always sleeping in her underwear. She found it more comfortable. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Tomorrow, she was going to see Miku again. She didn't know how to act around her. It made her a bit anxious. _It'll be fine... She probably only needs someone to be by her side and I'll make sure to be there for her..._ She would try to make her go outside to do all sort of activities with her. She would be the mother she never had, she would be the friend she can trust and have fun with... She would give her what she never had. She fell asleep with these thoughts in her mind.

**oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo**

Luka took herself a black coffee in the nurses' room. It tasted bitter, but she liked it like that. She nearly didn't get any sleep last time. She had kept on thinking about Miku and her situation. It was always in her mind. She felt really upset about it. After gulping down the hot liquid, she quickly went into the room the tealette was resting in. She opened the door with a smile, but it soon disappeared when she saw in which state Miku was; she was covered in sweat and her breathing seemed rough and difficult. She didn't need to touch her forehead to know she had a high fever. She rushed to her side and touched her skin. It was burning.

"Good morning, Luka..." Miku murmured weakly with a soft smile. Just opening her mouth to speak seemed to make her suffer. "You're as pretty as yesterday..."

The pinkette would have been surprised about the comment, especially at such a moment, but she felt so panicked that she couldn't even react to it. "If you weren't feeling well, then why didn't you call for someone!?" She shouted angrily at her. She wasn't thinking much about what she was saying.

The tealette's eyes widened in shock as she heard the tone she used. Uncomfortable, she averted her gaze away from her. "I...I just didn't want to bother anyone..." She breathed out with difficulty.

Luka calmed down a bit, realizing that she shouldn't have shouted at her like that. It just got her worried. "I'm sorry for having raised my voice..." She whispered softly. "You don't have to worry about bothering someone. Nurses are here to take care of you. You just have to press the red button next to your bed and someone will come." She explained to her, showing it to her. "Now open your mouth. I have to take your temperature."

Miku obeyed as Luka gently put the thermometer in her mouth, brushing her lips by accident while doing so. They were so soft despite them being dry. A mysterious shudder went though her body. She tried ignoring it and waited for the medical object to make a sound. When it did, she took it and looked at the result; 39.8 C. It was a high fever. She needed pills now. It needed to be healed as soon as possible, but first she had to know her symptoms. "Miku, how are you feeling? Do you have hallucinations? Do you feel confused? Do you have convulsions?" She asked quickly.

The tealette slowly shook her head. "I don't... I'm really thirsty though..." She whimpered. It really looked like she was suffering. "But I'm fine..."

Luka nodded and turned her back to her, ready to go search for what she needed. "You're probably dehydrated. I'll go search for a big glass of water and some pills." She spoke and started walking away, but a warm hand suddenly gripped her arm.

"W-Wait... don't leave me..."

The young woman was slightly taken aback. She certainly didn't expect this. She looked at her with a soft smile. "Don't worry, I'll be right back. Your fever needs to be healed immediately. It's dangerous at this point." She stated seriously and quickly searched for what she needed. It looked like she would have to keep a close eye on the tealette; she didn't seem to want to be taken care of and she was pretty sure she was feeling lonely.

When she had everything, she hastily came back to her room and gave her the glass of water and the pills, which she gulped down immediately. "Thanks, Luka..." She smiled softly at her and slowly sat down.

Luka didn't let her. She gently made her lay down again. "You have to rest. You're not in a state to be moving around." She murmured and examined her closely. She really was her type; noticeable hips, petite figure, small breasts. She was so delicate. She hated herself for having noticed how pretty she was. She cleared her dry throat. She had to change her mind. "So? How about you tell me more about yourself, Miku?" She asked, meeting with her vibrant teal eyes. It was always important to know more about her patients. She also felt strong curiosity burning her stomach. She wanted to know. She wanted to know what she liked, what she wanted to be in the future -or more like she _would_ have liked to be.

"Let me ask you about yourself first! How old are you?" Miku tilted her head to one side.

"I'm twenty. Surprising, right? Some people think I'm too young to be a nurse."

"Then, that means we only have four years of difference!" The tealette exclaimed with excitement in her voice. "I thought for sure that you were older. Not that you look old or anything like that!"

Luka gave her a loving smile. She was so adorable and sweet. She had a hard time believing she didn't have any friends. "Do you have any interests, Miku?" She murmured, sitting down on the bed next to her.

"I like romance, but most of all I like singing. I've always dreamed to be a singer, but I don't think I'm good enough..." The tealette chuckled. "But nobody heard me before, so I can't tell if other people would like it."

Luka was pleasantly surprised to hear that. She also sang a bit when she had time for herself. They at least had something in common. "I would like to hear you sing, then."

Miku blinked in surprise and immediately shook her head. "N-No way, it would be too embarrassing." She whispered a bit shyly.

They both stayed silent for a while, before Luka suddenly took her hands in hers and looked straight into her eyes. "I'll make you happy. I'll make sure you live the happiest moments of your life." She spoke suddenly and seriously. She didn't know what just got into her, but she wanted her to understand that she would be here for her.

Miku looked down and stayed silent for a moment. "...sure..." She answered unenthusiastically. She didn't really seem pleased about the idea.

Luka bit on her lower lip. She didn't understand; why did she suddenly look so sad?But it was okay; even if she knew she was going to suffer, she was going to take care of Miku as much as possible.

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**A/N:** I'm pretty pumped up about writing this story!

Review please? They're much appreciated!


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** So here's the second chapter.

Thanks for the reviews by the way. Also, I have some new ideas about this story, so it might have more chapters than I expected, but I'll do my best to finish it.

Since some people asked; yes, I'll continue The New Student Can't Be This Cute!, but the updates will be slow. I need a break from this story.

Enjoy.

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**Heart to Regret**

A week passed since Miku's arrival. Her condition was slowly getting worse. She had more noticeable symptoms; anemia, weakness, bones pain, frequent fever and migraines. She was sleeping most of the time, but when she was awake, she would start talking nonstop. She was quite the talkative and cheerful girl. Miku often had a smile on her face, she was rarely getting discouraged and she never once cried. Luka was obviously getting more and more attached to her. She liked talking to her and she enjoyed her presence. It came to the point where she often thought about her. She knew it was getting risky; she was already starting to suffer from the fact that, one day, she would never see her again, but it was too late to return back. The two of them became close. We could even say they were friends. She wished they would have met under different circumstances.

Luka was currently sat on the young girl's hospital bed. She was watching her sleep with loving eyes. She looked peaceful and adorable. She even had a small smile on her face. She gently touched her cheek with the tip of her fingers. Her skin was a bit cold, but it was as soft as porcelain. "Miku..." She murmured gently, trying to wake her up. She felt bad about doing so especially since she seemed to be having sweet dreams.

The tealette whined as she slowly opened her eyes. She didn't seem to realize where she was yet, but she soon sat up and nervously ran her fingers in her silky hair. "I...I was having a nice dream..." She murmured sheepishly. She was still a bit sleepy; her tiredness was written all over her face. She took a shaky breath. "I...I wish you wouldn't have woken me up. I had a boyfriend and he looked quite handsome. He was romantic too... We were holding hands at the beach and he was telling me how much he loved me. That's the situation I always dreamed to have. I...I wish it hadn't just been a dream, though..."

Luka nodded in acknowledgement. She felt a slight pain in her chest and she had a vague idea about what it could be, but she decided to shrug it off for now. It hurt a little. "I'm sorry to hear that, but you have to take your pills now." She whispered softly and gave her a glass of water with the medicaments. "I'm really sorry for having woken you up..."

Miku shook her head and gave her a charming smile. "It's fine don't worry! I have to face reality anyway; I'll never have a boyfriend and I'll die soon. That's how it is. There's nothing I can do about it." She spoke with a sigh and gulped down the pills. "To be honest, I don't mind dying even though you probably noticed it already. I'm not sad, just disappointed."

The young woman didn't know what to think. _Does she not like her life enough? Doesn't she mind dying because she isn't happy?_ Luka didn't like thinking about it. Miku was the kind of girl who deserved to be happy more than anyone. She didn't get it. She clenched her fists and looked away. She had to ask her. She had to ask her why she didn't mind that her life would be over soon, especially at such a young age. "Why? Why doesn't it make you sad? You're only sixteen... You still have so many things to do..." She muttered, her throat burning. She tried not to let her emotions get to her, but it was harder than she thought. Her chest felt heavy and her hands were shaking uncontrollably.

Miku's expression softened. "You don't need to worry about me, I'm fine. I... I just..." She trailed off. Luka could swear for a moment that the tealette looked upset. There was a long moment of silence in which both of them avoided staring at each other. It felt uncomfortable. "I... I don't really want to talk about it, but I'm fine. I don't want you to worry about me."

Miku always said she was fine, she always said everything was alright, but the pinkette hardly believe it; it couldn't be. Anyone wouldn't be fine in this situation. Luka decided to change the topic. It would be useless to talk about it now. The tealette clearly wasn't ready to open up to her. Still, what Lily told her about her not having caring parents and friends was still troubling her. "Anyway, how are you feeling right now?" She asked, her voice cracking inevitably.

"I'm pretty good! I don't even feel sick!" Miku exclaimed and stood up, a happy grin parting her lips. She stretched her arms. "I feel like going outside. I haven't had fresh air since I've arrived here. Do you think it could be possible?"

"I was actually going to ask you if you wanted to eat at a restaurant. I know you don't have much of an appetite, but it would be nice if you eat at least a bit. I already finished work for today anyway, What do you think?" Luka asked curiously. She had planned on bringing her there anyway. It wasn't a cheap restaurant, but it wasn't an expensive one either. It was just perfect. The atmosphere was calm and they would be able to talk without being bothered by noises. She often went there when she had a date.

Miku seemed pretty excited about the idea. She nodded cheerfully. "I'd love to! What should I wear? I brought some clothes just in case I would have to go out." She explained and went to look in her bags.

"Casual clothes will be alright." Luka murmured. She never had the chance to see her in another outfit than her hospital jacket yet. She felt rather curious about it -enough to make her mouth dry. "I'll be waiting outside your room. Just rejoin me when you'll be done changing, alright?" She asked kindly and went out of the room. She sat on a chair next to the secretary bureau and ruffled her pink hair. It was seriously hard. She couldn't breathe properly when she was close to her. It was suffocating. She was trying to stay strong, but seeing her condition getting worse with each new day was like a huge punch in the stomach. Not many people had the life they always dreamed to have. All Miku had wished for was to fall in love, and that simple wish would never be realized. She wished she could do something about it. She felt useless.

And the heartless reality always succeeded on giving her a stab in the heart; Miku would die soon.

"Luka, are you okay? You're making such a face." Someone asked with a bit of concern. It was Lily. She recognized her smooth, honeyed voice. "Hey what's wrong, hun? You're all pale."

The pinkette buried her face in her hands and stayed silent for a while. "I can't do this anymore. It's too hard..." She admitted painfully. "Lily, she's so kind, honest, sweet, positive... And she does the cutest smiles you have ever seen. She's strong, and that makes me even more worried about her. I... I want to stop seeing her... It hurts too much."

Lily stared at her with disbelief. She knew perfectly where this was going. "You've got to be kidding me." She spoke slowly and pursed her lips. "You like her. You freaking like her." She accused. She knew her enough to know those things.

Luka immediately shook her head, alarmed. "It's just a small crush! It won't last. It's always like this. It'll disappear soon." She defended herself. It was the truth. It was nothing more than a crush. It took her only a week to be attached to her. Falling in love or liking someone took more time than that.

"You always like the wrong girls. She'll die soon, she's already making you suffer and she's straight. Wow, good choice." Lily said sarcastically, rolling her eyes. She seemed a bit angry and Luka guessed it was mainly because she was worried about her.

"You know perfectly it's not a choice, Lily!" The young woman snapped, almost glaring at her. She didn't like her remarks sometimes. "It was inevitable. I knew it would happen ever since I've laid my eyes on her. She's completely my type. It's killing me..."

The blonde sighed, annoyed. "You knew it and yet you stubbornly accepted to take care of her. Tell me, Luka, what will you do if your crush transforms into something more? You'll see her suffer, you'll see her condition getting worse, you'll see her die with your own eyes and top of that she'll never return your feelings. Did you think about it?"

Luka growled and stood up. She was more than tired of Lily slapping her with reality. "I know all of this! Aren't you the one who encouraged me to take care of her in the first place?" She asked with obvious anger in her voice. Lily was only concerned about her, she knew it, but she wasn't obliged to remind her about those painful things.

"Look, we'll talk about it another time. Your girl is here." The blonde answered, pointing at her left with an unpleased expression on her face. "I've warned you. It's still not too late to return back. Ask someone else to take care of her and forget about her. That's the least you can do."

Luka didn't want that. She wanted to spend as much time as possible with her. She knew anyway that it was too late to return back; she was already too attached to her. She wanted to stay by her side. Lily sighed and shook her head in disappointment before leaving.

She wanted to believe she was right; the crush would disappear soon. It was only a matter of time.

"I'm sorry for having made you wait." A sheepish voice interrupted her thoughts.

"It's fine, I was-" She trailed off when she finally looked at her. She was absolutely beautiful. She was wearing a white dress with baby pink laces. She also had summer sandals, and ribbons had been used to attach her twintails. Luka was completely out of words, her crystal blue eyes carefully examining her. She had long and delicate legs, noticeable and round hips and a smooth, flawless pale skin. Her vibrant teal eyes were only enlightening her beauty.

"Don't stare at me too much..." Miku giggled and fidgeted a bit nervously. "I've bought that dress for the day I would go on a date and even prepared everything for the moment I would have a boyfriend, so I thought it would be a waste not to use it..."

Luka's breath was stuck in her throat. She was unable to speak properly. She was completely shocked. Shocked at how beautiful she was. There was no doubt about it; Miku was her type. "I... you're absolutely stunning..." She muttered in pure amazement, still staring at her petite figure.

The tealette blushed a light pink. "Thank you..." She replied simply, scratching her cheek shyly. "How about we go now? I'm kind of hungry."

It took Luka a few seconds before she finally reacted. She was still dazed. "Um... sure, let's go." She started walking away, making a gesture of the hand for her to follow her. She felt a bit nervous about the whole thing. It really felt like she was going on a date. Her heart was beating hard into her chest. She could hear it. "If you start feeling unwell you have to tell me, alright? I'll bring you back to the hospital immediately." She told her seriously. She knew how much Miku's life was in danger. She could die at any moment.

"Don't worry, I'll tell you." She replied with a faint smile as they arrived at the nurse's car. Luka opened the door for her. "A guy visited me yesterday. His name is Kaito. He was really kind to me. He even told me I was cute. He's pretty handsome too." She muttered and took the seat next to the driver's one, playing with her hands a bit nervously. "It made me really happy. I wonder if that's what we call 'love at first sight'. I can't wait to talk to him again."

This was enough to make Luka feel disheartened. It had to be expected. Kaito was also one of her patients. He had pneumonia, but it was healing rapidly. He was even allowed to leave his room. "He's a good guy." She confirmed and started driving. She felt disappointed. She was always expecting too much. If she were to seriously fall for Miku, she perfectly know she would suffer terribly. She hoped it wouldn't go further than a crush. It hurt already. "I can ask him to come visit you more often if you want." She said with a smile.

The petite girl immediately shook her head, a blush forming on her face. "N-No way! It would be too embarrassing!" She exclaimed with a whine, looking at the window.

"Why not? This might be finally your chance to know what love is." Luka spoke uncertainly. She honestly didn't like it, but if it could make Miku happy, she would do it. Her main goal was to give her the happiness she deserved before her death. It was all she wished for. She couldn't be selfish. "I'm sure he'll be happy to know you want to talk to him."

The tealette seemed to think about it before she finally heaved a sigh. "I prefer that you don't. If he really wants to talk to me, he'll just have to do it by himself." She explained simply.

Luka wasn't going to protest. She knew anyway that Kaito was probably going to talk to her again; who wouldn't want to speak with such a sweet girl like herself after all? She didn't even understand why she didn't have any friends. _There must be a reason..._ She preferred to wait until she would be ready to tell her about it. They stayed silent until they arrived at the restaurant. They even avoided looking at each other. There was some kind of inexplicable discomfort between them sometimes. When they entered inside, they immediately took a table near the window. There weren't many people, and Luka soon noticed there were mostly only couples. She could actually see them holding hands or looking at each other with loving eyes. Miku didn't seem to mind it much. Instead, she was looking at them quite intensively, and the pinkette guessed she probably liked looking at couples.

"I wish I would have been here for a date..." The tealette complained, but she soon noticed her mistake and straightened. "I...I mean it's not like I'm not happy to be with you! I really am!"

Luka nodded. She knew she hadn't meant it to sound like that, but her chest still felt heavy. She was hurt by her words. "It's fine, I-" She trailed off as she finally noticed who the waitress was; Gumi. She had forgotten she was working here. She tensed up. She was alone with girl, a Friday night. _This might be bad..._

"Hey Luka!" The cheerful greenette waved at her excitedly and went at her table. "Long time no see! What brings you here?" She asked and finally noticed the girl she was with. She examined her carefully before a grin parted her lips. "Whoa! You brought a real cutie this time."

Miku looked at Gumi, her eyebrows furrowed. She seemed a bit confused. "Um... thanks?"

The waitress turned to the young woman with a smirk. "Geez! Why didn't you tell me you got a new-" She suddenly froze when she saw the cold glare Luka was giving her. She then realized she misunderstood the situation. "...friend! Yeah a friend! I told you I like meeting your new... friends..." She tried correcting herself.

The pinkette looked at Miku. She didn't seem to have suspected anything. She disliked how Gumi acted sometimes. She was too noisy. She was surprised it wasn't the reason why Lily broke up with her. "We'll take the salad of the day." She simply said, not wanting to introduce her new friend to her. She knew the tealette wouldn't be able to eat much, so a salad was just perfect. Gumi nodded and gave her a discreet wink as if saying 'try your best! I'll be cheering on you'. She knew it meant that, but she wasn't going to make a move on her. She was quite shocked to see she didn't seem to be heartbroken. She knew how much the greenette loved Lily and she had thought their recent breakup might have made her depressed.

"She seems fun." Miku commented with a chuckle. "I like cheerful people."

"She is. She's one of my closest friends. Though, I wish she wouldn't be so loud sometimes."

"Oh! I know what you mean! I used to have a friend who-" She suddenly stopped mid-sentence as her expression fell. It looked like it brought bad memories.

"Miku, are you okay?" Luka asked worriedly, placing a hand on top of hers. The simple touch made her shudder. It almost felt electrifying, as if sudden warmth was going through her whole body. She never had felt something like this before. It was a bit scary.

"I...I'm fine..." She murmured and looked down. "A-Anyway, let's change topic!" She put a hand under her chin as if thinking about something. "Ah! How comes you don't have a boyfriend? I thought you would be popular around guys. I mean you're just so pretty and kind."

Luka knew this topic would come up sooner or later; her love life. She was popular around guys, but she wished she was popular with the same gender instead. She took a deep breath. She should tell her. She was sure Miku wouldn't judge her. She wasn't that kind of girl. "I'm not interested in men." She vaguely admitted.

"Huh?" The tealette made a confused face. "You mean you're not interested in having a relationship?"

The woman's lower lip trembled. It looked like she would have to tell her clearly. It made her nervous. Her heartbeats accelerated. "I don't want to be in a relationship with men..." She spoke slowly, "but with...women."

Miku blinked in surprise. She was obviously shocked. She couldn't blame her; anyone would be. There was a long moment of silence in which Luka dreaded the worse. What if it changed who she was to her? What if she decided to not talk to her again? She felt a lump forming in her throat. A second felt like eternity.

"...Oh." The tealette finally reacted. "Wow... I... I didn't expect that. I mean you're so pretty and feminine, I thought-"

"Are you one of those people who think all lesbians are masculine?" Luka interrupted her with a surprisingly harsh tone of voice. She hated that stereotype and she felt like Miku's reactions wouldn't be good.

"Ah! No no! I mean-" She trailed off and took a shaky breath. It looked like she didn't know what to say. She took a few more seconds to calm down, before speaking again, "I...I'm sorry, I didn't mean to react like that. It just made me nervous, but I want to let you know that I'm okay with it. You don't have to worry about me changing my opinion on you." She reassured her with a smile.

Luka felt like a weight had been removed from her shoulders. She had been so worried about it, thinking about so many possibilities, but it went better than she thought. "Thank you..." She murmured, meeting with her teal eyes. Miku immediately looked away as if it was suddenly making her uncomfortable.

"I...I mean love shouldn't be about gender. I don't even see why people would be against...um...two men or two women together..." Miku explained a bit awkwardly. The poor girl seemed so anxious; her voice was wavering.

"Miku, what makes you so nervous?" Luka decided to ask with a frown. Even though she told her it wouldn't change her opinion about her, it really looked like it would.

"I don't know..." She admitted and finally met with her eyes. "But I do accept it, you don't have to worry. Since I was going to ask about your type of guys anyway, what's your type of girls then?" She asked with obvious curiosity.

Luka was taken aback. She certainly didn't expect that question. She swallowed hard. Miku was looking at her with so much intensity that it made her feel extremely nervous. "I like... delicate girls. I like when they're smaller and younger than me. I guess you could say I prefer the cute ones over the womanly or masculine type." She replied hesitantly. She hoped the tealette wouldn't recognize herself; she was what we could call the cute type, after all.

Miku simply nodded in acknowledgement, not saying anything. They stayed silent until the food arrived. Gumi was staring at them with a cheesy grin on her face. "Bon appetite!" She exclaimed and gave Luka some pats on the back before leaving them alone again.

The tealette giggled, mildly amused. "Does she think we're...dating?" She asked with uncertainty in her voice.

The young woman hadn't expected her to ask such a thing. She heaved a sigh. "Each time I'm coming here with a girl, she always thinks it's a date." She explained and took a tomato from her salad, putting it in her mouth. She slowly chewed on it.

Miku smiled. It was obvious she didn't have much of an appetite; she was playing with her fork while staring at her food. "Did you want it to be a date?" She inquired, tilting her head.

Luka immediately stiffened her knees in an effort to prevent them from trembling. Her cheeks became a light pink. Miku was surprisingly getting bold. "No... of course not." She answered. It was a lie. She wanted it to be a date since the beginning, but she knew the young girl wasn't feeling the same way.

Miku's eyebrows furrowed. No words were spoken afterwards. Sometimes they would cast some shy glances at each other, but that was about it. There was even one time when their hands accidentally brushed under the table. Miku had immediately pulled away, as if the simple gesture had made her uncomfortable. And as usual the touch had been enough to make Luka breathless for a moment.

When they finally finished eating, they both headed to the car. The moon was full; it was illuminating the dark sky in a comforting way. The stars were plenty visible. Miku seemed to be rapt with wonder. "One of my dreams is to watch the stars with my beloved one. You know, being in his arms while looking at them. It sounds so romantic." She murmured with a dreamy smile parting her lips.

"Is that so." The pinkette replied and ran her fingers in her long pink hair. She was afraid it appeared a bit cold, so she immediately added something, "If you actually get a boyfriend, you might be disappointed. You have to be extremely lucky to get someone romantic."

"I know, but it's not like I have enough time to experience all those things..." Miku whispered with sudden disappointment in her voice. "But I'm fine! I had a wonderful night and it's all thanks to you." She gave her one of her most charming smiles.

It had been enough to make Luka out of words for a moment. She was making such adorable smiles; enough to make her forget about reality. "I...I had fun too..." She admitted a bit sheepishly. It was true. It had been a while since she last felt something like this. Being a nurse was quite exhausting and she rarely got time for herself. She felt oddly comfortable around the young girl. She enjoyed her presence greatly.

"...Can I give you a hug?" Miku suddenly asked. "I'm sorry if this sounds weird, but I really want to...hug you."

Luka felt her heartbeat accelerate in anticipation. There was no way she was going to refuse something like this. She always dreamed of holding her petite frame. "Come here..." She whispered, breathlessly. It didn't think a long time before she felt arms around her waist. She immediately pulled her close. Everything was completely dazing. She could Miku's breathing on her skin, making her shudder. She could feel her lips brush her cleavage. She could feel her curves pressed against her own. She closed her eyes and took a ragged breath, trying not to think too much of it, but it was hard.

"Can I stay with you tonight? I don't want to return to the hospital..."

When Miku was speaking, she could feel her lips move against her skin, making her tense up. Was she asking if she could stay the night at her house? She nodded uncertainly. "A-Alright..." She replied shakily. Miku's thumb was against her spine, slowly stroking. Luka bit on her lower lip. She was getting a bit hot; it was getting too far. It had to stop now.

She could notice Gumi behind her. She had just finished working. She was looking at her with her thumbs up. She rolled her eyes and gently pushed Miku away. "Can you wait in the car? I have to talk to someone." She told her softly. The tealette nodded. Without saying anything, she went in the car and gave her a faint smile. Luka approached Gumi. "It's not what you think. It wasn't a date and she won't be my girlfriend either." She spoke sternly, wanting her to understand.

"Why not? Isn't she your type? And besides, you two seem to get along well!" She exclaimed in excitement. "And you're looking at her with such loving eyes! You definitely like her!"

Luka looked away for a moment and exhaled deeply. "It's more complicated than that..." She muttered, knowing she was unaware about the situation. "She... she has a cancer and it's not even curable anymore... She'll die soon, Gumi..."

Gumi's cheerful expression suddenly transformed into a grieved and shocked one. "Oh no, this is so sad... I...I'm sorry to hear that..." She murmured, suddenly uncomfortable.

"It's fine." Luka replied and gave her a pinch on the cheek. "How are things going with Lily? I heard that she broke up with you."

The greenette sighed. She knew this conversation would come up sooner and later. "I really love her, Luka, but I guess I'm not good enough for her. Let's not talk about it. I'll get over her eventually. She isn't even worth it. She's so impolite, crude, perverted and disrespectful! And yet I fell for her. I'm such an idiot."

Luka couldn't restrain a chuckle as Gumi enumerated Lily's flaws. "That's right. You can definitely get someone better than her. I can assure you that." She stated seriously. "She isn't good enough for you."

Gumi twirled her green hair and gave a nod. "What about you? Are you going to be alright? You seem to like her a lot... It's written all over your face."

The pinkette didn't honestly know. She was getting more and more attached to her. She knew it was dangerous at this point. "I'll be fine. It's just a small crush. It'll go away. It's just a matter of time." She tried reassuring herself. "Anyway I have to go. I don't want to make her wait any longer. Take care." She kissed her cheek and headed to her car. She could tell Gumi was sad from her break up with Lily; she just wasn't showing it. She would have a talk with the blonde about it. It couldn't stay that way between them.

Miku was listening to music. She was even humming, taping her index on her thigh. She was so lost in the song that she didn't even notice Luka was beside her. She smiled softly. Her voice, following the rhythm, sounded melodious. "I guess you like music a lot." She interrupted her reverie.

The tealette jumped slightly as if she hadn't expected to hear a voice. She straightened. "I...I do..." She had a blush on her face. It looked like it embarrassed her to have been caught.

"I think you have a nice voice. I like it." Luka complimented as she started driving. She really meant it. She would have liked to hear more of it, but she knew she was probably too shy to do so.

When they arrived at her house, they both entered inside. Miku was exhausted. She seemed to have difficulty with just walking. "I...need to get some rest..." She mumbled and leaned against the wall, which immediately worried Luka.

"Are you alright? Are you sure you don't want to return to the hospital?"

The tealette shook her head. "No... I just need to get to bed. Where should I sleep?"

"I only have a bed, but I wouldn't mind sleeping on the sofa, so you can take it."

Miku immediately clutched onto her shirt and looked down. "I...want you to stay with me. Can you sleep by my side?"

Luka's heart skipped a beat. She felt a lump forming in her throat. What was she getting so nervous about? The tealette only wanted to sleep next to her, nothing more. "Sure, if that's what you want. My pajamas might be a bit too large for you, but I'll search for something that might suit you. Come with me." She took her hand. It was a bit moist as if she was anxious. She smiled reassuringly at her and went to search in her drawers. The only thing she found was a large shirt that would at least arrive at her knees. She wouldn't need to wear any pants. "Is this alright with you?" She asked with a frown.

"It'll be alright. Thank you." She muttered and suddenly started undressing in front of her.

Luka's froze. Her face became scarlet. And here she thought Miku would be all prude, knowing how embarrassed she could get. She immediately looked away. "C-Can you change elsewhere?" She asked, her voice trembling. Her nervousness was probably noticeable and she hated herself for it. Her heart was beating hard into her chest. She could hear it. She could hear Miku's dress fall down on the floor. Her breath got caught in her throat with just knowing she was in her underwear.

"We're both girls."

"Yes, but I'm a woman who looks at girls the same way men look at them."

It drew a giggle from Miku. "I don't mind. You can look at me if that's what you desire so much." She spoke jokingly. Luka slowly turned her head and looked at her. Her breath got caught in her throat. She was so pretty despite being sick. Her skin was pale, she had noticeable hips and small breasts. She was so skinny; she could almost see her ribs. Miku suddenly tried to hide her body with the shirt she was holding, her face as red as a tomato. "I...I didn't mean for you to stare at me like that... I...I was just joking..." She stuttered, obviously embarrassed.

The young woman's eyes widened. She immediately looked away. "I...I'm sorry. It was stronger than me. I just-" She trailed off, hating herself for having made her uncomfortable. "I...I'll change myself. I'll be right back." She quickly grabbed her lace nightgown and hastily changed herself in the bathroom. She took several deep breaths. She had to calm down. The beating of her heart was fast and her hands were shaking uncontrollably. Miku was completely her type. It was killing her inside. She splashed her face with cold water. She had to change her thoughts. The tealette didn't want anything of this. She returned back into the bedroom. "Miku, I..." She stopped talking when she noticed she was already asleep. She was even snoring a bit. She really was exhausted after all. She quickly went by her side and covered her frail body. She wrapped her arms from behind her and pulled her close. It didn't even succeed on waking her up. She played with her teal hair as her expression softened.

She knew she would suffer greatly. She was already too attached to her. It scared her. She knew she would see her condition become worse. But for now, she should enjoy the moments she would pass with her as much as possible. She would try making her happy. With those thoughts in mind, she rapidly fell asleep.

**oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo**

Luka slowly opened her eyes, but quickly closed them when the sunlight burnt them. She groaned and sat up. She was pretty sure her hair was a real mess right now. She looked beside her and noticed Miku wasn't here. She frowned and stood up. "Miku?" She called out and noticed the bathroom's door was closed. She could hear some whines. She went closer and knocked on it. "Miku? Are you alright?" She asked with a frown.

She didn't receive any answers.

Worried, she opened the door and gasped at the sight; the tealette was curled up on the floor Her skin was a bit greenish and she was covered in sweat. She was convulsing slightly. It looked like she had difficulty breathing. She immediately called an ambulance and returned back at her side. She kneeled down next to her and touched her forehead. It was hot. She was having a high fever again. She growled. She knew she should have brought her to the hospital after dinner.

"Stop...pitying me." Miku suddenly whimpered. For the first time, Luka could actually see tears forming in her eyes. "They...ordered you to take care of me, but I don't want that... I don't want you to care for me because they asked you to... Please stop..." She breathed out with difficulty. "It hurts..."

Luka's eyes widened in shock. It was true. At the beginning, she accepted taking care of her because her boss asked her to, but it wasn't like that anymore. She wanted to be by her side because she wanted to. She wanted to spend as much time with her as possible. She wanted to see more of her cute smiles. "That's not true... I really care about you..."

Miku didn't say anything for a while. She had her eyes closed. "I... don't believe this... Stop giving me false hope..."

Luka didn't understand anymore. She wanted to tell her how much she enjoyed her presence, but she couldn't even find the right words to say, so she stayed silent until the ambulance arrived. They took her and rapidly brought her to the hospital.

It hurt. It hurt to think Miku thought such a thing.

* * *

******A/N:** There's already some angst. Well that's not surprising since I'm the Queen of angst.

Thanks to **Asagi Shiro **for having corrected my mistakes.

Review?


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:** If you don't like angsty and sad stories, please stop reading. I received complains about people telling me I should stop writing depressing things. It's my favorite genre. If you don't like it, just stop reading my stories already.

I'm about to say something personal and I'm not searching for pity. My father died three months ago. I was rather close to him. It's kind of hard for me to write this fic, to be honest, but I want to do it. Losing someone you love gives you emotional scars for the rest of your life even though I'm doing a lot better now.

Anyway, let's not get too emotional, and enjoy!

* * *

**Heart to Regret**

_Stop pitying me._

_Stop giving me false hope._

Luka's fingers gripped firmly around the coffee cup she was holding. She kept thinking about what Miku said. It was haunting her. Simple words never troubled her that much before. She was hardly getting sleep, and she had that ache in her chest that wouldn't go away, no matter what. She needed to talk to her, but it would be difficult doing so, considering the fact she had asked another nurse to take care of her. She was a coward. She couldn't even face her anymore. She had decided to follow what Lily had told her; forgetting about her and stopping seeing her. It was the best thing she could do. She wanted to believe it was. She would eventually forget about those troublesome feelings. It was only a matter of time. She took a trembling breath and put on a confident smile.

_You're a strong woman, Luka. You've been through a lot already and you know you can do this. You'll get over it... Like always._

It was true. It wasn't the first time she was getting hurt by a girl. And she knew she would eventually get through it. She just needed time. Time always repaired a broken heart.

It had been a week already. A week since she last spoke to Miku. It felt like an eternity. She had gotten used to her cheery behavior.

"Hey, Luka." An honeyed voice interrupted her thoughts. She didn't even need to turn around to know it was Lily. "How are you?"

Her blonde friend was obviously concerned about her; she kept asking her how she was and she was even going as far as telling her that if she needed to talk, she was here. She was glad to have a friend like her even with her inappropriate and stubborn behavior. She was still very caring. "I'm doing alright, I guess." She murmured and took a long sip of her black coffee.

Lily gave a nod. She opened her mouth, hesitated, but then closed it. She looked away and pursed her lips.

"Lily? What is it? Tell me." Luka frowned. She knew she had something to tell her, but didn't want to. It was written all over her face. She hated when she did that.

The tall woman sighed and ran her fingers through her blonde hair. "Promise me not to panic, but Miku... She's gone since this morning. She left her hospital bed. We have no idea where she is." She admitted, raising her hands in the air as a sign of exasperation. "Kaito left too. We're suspecting that they both decided to escape together."

Luka forgot how to breathe for a moment, her throat tightening from the shock the news just procured her. It couldn't be. The tealette needed to be watched; she could get weak at any moment! Her fingers became numb as she found herself unable to hold her coffee cup anymore. She let it fall on the table. "W-We need to find her fast..." She mumbled incomprehensibly. She started walking away, but she was stopped by a firm grip on the arm.

"Luka, people are already searching for her. Go home. Your working hours are over. We'll find her, I promise."

"You don't understand the situation, Lily! I've seen it with my own eyes; Miku can get extremely sick at any moment and if we don't do anything fast, she might die! We can't leave her alone!"

Lily knew Luka would get stubborn about it and she found herself regretting having told her. "I know that, but be reasonable. You can't find her that easily. Besides, I've heard that Kaito and her are getting along pretty damn well. If you find her, you might see something you don't want to see."

Luka tried not to flinch at her words. She remembered how shy and excited Miku had gotten when she had spoken about him to her. "So? If that's true, I would be happy for her. Isn't what she wants? To have a boyfriend?" She asked, her voice cracking inevitably. She honestly didn't like the thought of someone else giving her the first kiss she had always dreamed to have. She didn't like the thought of her discovering what love was with someone other than her. She knew that deep down she really didn't want it to happen. She felt selfish.

Lily stared at her in silence. She guessed how emotionally hurt she was. She had been friends with her for so long after all and saw all the heartbreaks she had been through. "You shouldn't have fallen for her. You're getting yourself in a real mess again..." She spoke in a murmur.

The pinkette decided not to answer. She took the doorknob and left. Lily was right. She shouldn't have fallen in love with her. It wasn't like it was a choice anyway. If it was, maybe she would have had a husband already. She lost hope in love a long time ago. She headed to her car. It was already dark outside. She could hear the crickets, and the cold breeze was giving her some shudders.

She took her keys and unlocked the door to the driver's seat before she heard someone calling her name in a hoarse voice. She froze and turned her head. At the end of the parking, she could see two dark silhouettes and she immediately guessed it was Miku and Kaito. She rapidly approached them and noticed the tealette was crouched down on the ground as if she had difficulty standing up. The blue-haired young man seemed a bit panicked.

Luka instantly kneeled down next to her and tried to look at her face, but she kept on staring at the ground. "Miku, are you okay? Let's get back inside, alright?" She asked softly, trying to show her that she wasn't angry at her for having left her hospital bed without saying anything.

"I'm...sorry." The young girl mumbled. She raised her head and their eyes met for the first time since what had seemed an eternity. Luka had forgotten how magnificent they were. It was enough to take her breath away.

Though, the strong smell of alcohol suddenly made her freeze. It came from Miku's breath. "You've got to be kidding me..." She murmured in shock. She stared at Kaito with a piercing glare. "You've made her drink even though she's sick!?"

The young man gulped his saliva down with difficulty and scratched the back of his head with a guilty expression on his face. "She's the one who wanted to." He defended himself and let his hands drop to his side.

"You should have stopped her!" Luka replied back, trying not to shout. She looked down at Miku. "Are you able to stand up?"

"I...I think so." The tealette gave a lazy nod as she stood up with a bit of difficulty. She leaned against the pinkette for support. The young woman then wrapped an arm around her waist, trying not to think about how curvy and elegant it felt. She was wearing a short skirt and a tight, expensive-looking shirt. It really looked like she wore this for a date. She cringed at the thought.

"Are you drunk?"

"N-Not really... I haven't drank that much. I... I'm just a bit tipsy and exhausted, I guess..." Miku stammered. She couldn't even concentrate on what she was saying.

Luka highly doubt she was just tipsy, but at least she still seemed to have her full mind. "Don't ever leave the hospital without saying anything. You need to be watched and taken care of. We were worried about you. A lot of people went to search for you."

Miku kept silent for a while before looking away. "...Why are you doing this anyway? You don't need to anymore since you left me." She told her in a rebuking tone of voice. It was obvious how she had been offended because of it.

The pinkette's eyes widened. She didn't think the other female would take it like that. "I just... I thought you're the one who didn't want to see me anymore." She explained. It was half a lie; it was true that she thought Miku wouldn't want to see her anymore, but it was also because she took the decision of forgetting her.

"You... you still left me without saying anything! D-Do you know how shocked I was when another nurse came to see me t-to tell me she was now going to t-take care of me? I... I don't like her. She's strict and she stinks." The tealette stumbled in her words.

Luka didn't say anything. Miku needed to rest. She probably didn't even know what she was saying. "Let's just bring you to your room first, alright?" She asked, trying to be soothing as she stroked her back. People seemed to be relieved when they saw the 'young girl with an incurable cancer'. They really thought she wouldn't come back. She make her lay down on her hospital bed and took her temperature. She did a bit of fever. They were quite frequent. She couldn't even give her pills because of the alcohol in her body. It would be dangerous. She took an hospital jacket and gave it to her. "You should change yourself. You can't stay in your clothes." She told her.

Miku stared at it with a groan. She lazily sat up. "Can you help me? My body feels sore and my bones hurt. I won't be able to change by myself."

Luka didn't feel comfortable about doing so. It would mean seeing the tealette naked and it wasn't a good idea. She was already nervous about the idea. "I...I'll ask someone else... I'm not supposed to be working at the moment." She explained a bit awkwardly.

"I don't care. Undress me now."

The pinkette couldn't help the heat from getting to her face. That controlling behavior was nothing like the Miku she knew. She was definitely under the influence of alcohol. With trembling hands, she went to unbutton the girl's shirt, trying not to stare too much at that pale, soft-looking skin. She soon noticed she wasn't wearing any bra, her pink nipples showing off as soon as she slid the piece of cloth down her body. There was a red bruise on the side of her breast and she guessed it was because of her cancer. It was initially a breast cancer after all -the tumor had just spread through other parts of her body. It was rare for young women to have it, but it was still possible despite the very low chance of having it. She took a deep breath. She traced the bruise with a finger. It made Miku flinch. "Does it hurt?" The nurse asked softly, gently caressing it.

"It... it doesn't."

The teenager's breathing hitched and Luka knew she shouldn't have touched her so intimately. The bruise was near her nipple and that area was quite sensitive to caresses. She apologized and looked away in embarrassment. The tealette knew about her sexual preference, she might find it inappropriate.

"It's fine. It felt nice." Miku admitted a bit sheepishly. "I...I mean you were just making sure it doesn't hurt. There's nothing wrong with that."

Luka was surprised. The tealette wasn't reluctant about it at all. "Were you on a date with him?" She decided to ask as she shyly pulled her skirt down. She stared at her legs for a moment. They were delicate. She felt a urge to touch them, but restrained herself, a burning feeling forming in the pit of her stomach. Miku was absolutely beautiful. "I've heard you two are getting along pretty well."

The tealette gave a slow and absent nod. "He... he asked me out and I accepted. It was rather boring, to be honest. He would make a good friend, but nothing more." She explained, standing up with a painful groan. She felt like her whole body had been compressed. It hurt just to move a finger.

Luka's breath got caught in her throat. Miku was completely naked in front of her. She averted her gaze, her heart beating hard into her chest. A feeling of great relief invaded her. She wasn't interested in Kaito. It was all she needed to know. "I-Is that so? That's unfortunate. Y-You could have gotten your romance from him..." She cursed herself for stammering that much. She exhaled shakily. She needed to calm down. Burning feelings were boiling up inside her.

Small hands suddenly grabbed her hips as she was pushed against the wall. She felt something press against her body and her breathing immediately quickened. Delicate and feminine curves. It was too intimate to be a simple hug. Blood rushed to her face. She looked down at Miku. She couldn't describe her expression. "M-Miku, what are you doing? G-Get off me..." She murmured. The teenager's thumb was gently stroking her spine, sending her electrifying shudders. She could feel her pulse down there, right between her legs. She took several breaths. She was getting turned on by the situation; the tealette's luscious naked form didn't help to calm down. She pressed her knees together.

The young girl buried her face into her shoulder. "Please, don't leave me anymore. I was really sad thinking that we might not see each other again. I got attached to you." She spoke in a hoarse and desperate whisper.

The taller woman cleared her throat. Her mind was a bit foggy. She didn't know if Miku was saying this because she was a bit drunk, but she couldn't find it in herself to care. "Y-You said something about stopping pitying you..." She could only mutter. Her heart was beating in her temples, her palms tingling. "At first, I... I was taking care of you because I was asked to, but now I..." She lowered her voice.

"I'm fond of you."

The tealette raised her head, an angelic smile parting her lips. Their faces were now mere inches apart. Luka could smell the other female's alcoholic-smelling breath. She could see incertitude in her vibrant teal eyes as Miku slowly leaned in closer and closer. Luka felt her throat burn in anticipation, her heartbeats accelerating drastically. She couldn't escape. She couldn't tell the tealette not to do this mistake that she would probably regret the next day. Her breath choked in her throat as she tried to speak. She was completely stuck between the girl and the wall. And even though she knew this shouldn't be happening, she let it happen.

Miku's lips were soft and warm. The kiss was surprising slow and gentle at first, both of them tasting the moment, but the uncertainty they felt soon left as they let the burning passion invade them. Luka kissed her back with everything she had, her hand eagerly exploring her silky hair, stroking and pulling gently. The young girl's grip around her waist tightened as she pressed her naked body against her, wanting to feel her warmth. Their hearts were beating in unison. The room felt hot. The air was suffocating. Their worries, their sadness, their pain... Everything was gone. Only that moment of bliss and pure tenderness mattered. They didn't want it to end. They wanted it to last forever, but there was so much passion into the kiss that they were both quickly losing their breath from all the sudden excitation and euphoria.

Luka enjoyed feeling Miku's curves under her exploring hands. She enjoyed the breathy and hot moans she was letting out. She enjoyed everything; the kiss was nothing like the other ones she had shared in the past. Unfortunately, that moment had to end as they both pulled away to catch their breath. They were still both dazed, staring into each other's eyes as if they had been given the most beautiful gift in the world.

Then, Miku suddenly made a few steps back and sat down on her hospital bed with an utterly shocked expression, her mouth slightly agape. This was enough to pull Luka out of her reverie. "U-Um, I should probably go now... I... I have other things to do." She blurted out as she quickly hurried away. Her heart was still playing loud drums in her chest, her breathing slightly ragged. She couldn't believe it. What she thought impossible happened. She didn't know if she should be happy about it or not. Miku might have been influenced by the alcohol. Wasn't that the young girl's first kiss? The one she had dreamed to have with the perfect guy, the charming prince? She pursed her lips strongly. She was pretty sure she was going to regret it. She shouldn't have let it happen. They both shouldn't have.

She really was getting herself in a real mess...

**oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo**

Luka barely got enough sleep last night. She had kept on thinking about what happened. She remembered how warm and tender Miku's lips had felt against hers. She remembered how soft her skin had been. She could have felt her body getting insanely hot under her intimate caresses. She wanted to believe the tealette had enjoyed what happened as much as she did. She heaved a sigh. Even if it was the case, wouldn't they both suffer? Suffer from an ending love? Wasn't she getting into conclusion too fast anyway? Maybe the kiss meant nothing. It had only been two weeks since they knew each other, after all. It was insane to have such a strong attraction in a short period of time. She didn't believe it possible. It might be something physical. She was honestly confused.

She got up, put on her nurse uniform and stared at her reflection in the mirror. She was pretty. She knew she was. Gumi even told her she could attract straight girls if she wanted to. It did happen once, and the woman ended up cheating on her with some guy.

She walked into the kitchen and her eyes widened at the sight; Lily was here. She was searching for something in her fridge. She gave her the keys to her house and she was starting to think it was a bad idea.

"Lily, what are you doing?"

Her friend turned around with a sheepish grin. "Well, y'see, I spent all my money on alcohol and I don't have anything left to eat..." She explained and took an apple, biting on it. "So I thought you'd be kind enough to give me some food, y'know."

Luka stared at her in disbelief. "You could have called me instead of barging in." She murmured, exasperated. She soon frowned. "Lily, you told me you stopped drinking. What happened? I know you, you get drunk only when you're heartbroken." She pointed out, arms crossed.

Lily sighed and ran her fingers in her long blonde hair.

"We can't hide anything from you, eh?"

"Go ahead and tell me."

"Well..." She cleared her throat and hesitated before opening her mouth. "It's Gumi. I freaking love her."

"Then, why did you break up with her?"

"Luka, do you really have to ask why? That girl deserves better than me. She's going to waste her time with me. She's kind, honest, polite, good-looking... Man, she's perfect."

Luka stayed silent for a moment. She knew Lily was right; Gumi deserved better, but it wasn't like the blonde wasn't a nice person. She could be a good listener and she was the kind of girl you could easily trust. She wasn't as bad as she looked. She smiled softly. "Gumi loves you as you are. She knows that behind this tough behavior you have, you're one of the sweetest girls she could ever meet. When she talks to me about you, it's obvious you're the most important thing in the world. She was heartbroken last time I spoke to her. You should think about it before ending things between you two." She suggested. She honestly felt glad for both of them. She did believe they were meant to be together. Gumi would be happy if she were to learn that.

Lily gave a nod and turned around to hide her obvious embarrassment. "A-Anyway, I heard they found the little girl." She spoke, trying to change the topic.

Luka stiffened. Maybe she should talk about what happened. She knew the blonde was going to judge her, but she needed to let it out. She took an exhale and straightened herself. "She kissed me." She admitted above a whisper.

Lily's face crisped in shock. She stared at her friend to make sure it wasn't some kind of bad joke. When she was sure she was serious, she immediately got angry. She approached Luka and pointed an accusing finger against her chest. "Aren't you the one who kissed her?" She replied back through clenched teeth.

The pinkette slowly shook her head. She felt a lump forming in her throat. She closed her eyes to prevent seeing her friend's expression.

"She did..."

"Shit, you've got to be kidding me..."

There was a long moment of silence and there was no need for words. She knew how worried and mad Lily was.

"Okay. Let's suppose she fell in love with you, what are you going to do?" The blonde asked. She then shook her head and let out a forced laugh. "Screw this. I know what you're going to do; you're going to spend your time with her and see how weak she'll become and then she'll die before your own freaking eyes. Such a great idea."

Luka let her slap her with her harsh and truthful words. Her heart sunk in her chest. "That's right. If that's the case, I'm going to make her happy and show her the most wonderful moments she would ever have." She decided determinately even though her voice was unsteady. She stood up and headed to the door. "I've helplessly fallen in love with her and there's nothing you can do about it."

She took the doorknob and left without saying anything else. She entered her car and gripped the steering wheel as hard she could, resting her head against it. Her chest felt heavy. She seriously fell in love with Miku. She knew it now. It was a kiss like nobody ever gave her before, a kiss filled with burning passion and unconditional love. Just by thinking about it, she could hear the loud beating of her heart. If it hadn't been for them losing their breath, she would have continued for so much longer. The feeling of her soft skin, the feeling of her alluring lips moving against hers... She wanted so much more.

_I'm not the romantic type... If Miku fell for me, she chose the wrong person._

Luka started driving to the hospital. She wondered if she should take care of her again. She could ask her boss. But what told her the tealette wanted to now, especially after what happened between them? Miku had seemed pretty shocked after all. It wasn't like she didn't enjoy it anyway; it was obvious she had been into it as much as she did. Her breath got stuck in her throat just remembering how the tealette had pressed her naked body desperately against her, as if searching for some kind of warmth.

They needed to talk.

She entered inside and greeted her coworkers. They all seemed busy and she guessed why; one of their patients died. There were three children crying and a woman trying to comfort them despite tears running down her own cheeks. The husband was the only one missing. His life ended, leaving his big family behind. She tried not to be affected by the sight. It was always so heartbreaking and yet there was nothing they could do. She took a long, trembling breath and left the main hall.

Once she arrived in front of Miku's door, she bit on her lower lip strongly. She was scared. And yet she knew they needed to sort things out. It couldn't stay that way. She was pretty sure this situation bothered the young girl as much as her. She slowly opened the door, which did an indiscreet cracking sound.

The tealette wasn't looking at her. She was staring at the window. She couldn't see her expression, but she understood she knew she was here. They both stayed silent until the Miku decided to break the uncomfortable silence, "I didn't want my first kiss to happen that way." She admitted in a whisper, her voice wavering. She hugged her legs and buried her face in them.

Luka averted her eyes away from her. She knew Miku would regret it, but it hurt more than she thought to hear her say it. She was about to reply something, to apologize for not having pushed her away when she should have, but was interrupted by weak sobs. Her eyes widened. The tealette's body was shaking. It was obvious she was crying. It was rare for her to let her emotions out, especially in front of others. Luka stared at her painfully, her chest aching. She certainly didn't like it.

"Miku..."

"I...I'm sorry... I'm so sorry..." She said almost incomprehensibly, chocking on her own words. "I... I keep hurting you without even noticing it."

The young woman slowly approached her and sat down on the bed next to her. "I wonder who's more hurt between the two of us..." She told her a bit absently. She wondered if Miku was the kind of person who only pretended to be strong when she wasn't. "Would you rather us to stop seeing each other?" She decided to ask, trying not to let show how much she didn't want this.

The tealette quickly raised her head, alarmed. "I don't want that." She said with a hurtful expression. She didn't say anything for a minute, before speaking again, "I'm starting to think I shouldn't have wished to fall in love. What's the point of wanting an ending, tragical love?"

Luka's heart skipped a beat. She didn't know what to think of this. Did it mean Miku feel the same way? She wasn't sure, but she knew it wasn't the right moment to jump into conclusions. She gently pulled the shaking girl into an embrace and stroked her back.

They were both getting in a real mess.

* * *

**A/N:** My writing really became more sexual. Haha...

Thanks a lot for the reviews, guys. They're really appreciated.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:** Hello!

Thanks a lot for the comments, guys. They're really appreciated. I'm glad to see some people that are always here to support me (I'm talking about Shiro, my lovely Yami, Stalker and One-x-Three. I might be forgetting some, I'm sorry.) But hey, thanks to the others as well! It's really appreciated!

Enjoy.

* * *

**Heart to Regret**

It was quite cold outside. Not enough to be snowing, but enough to transform people's breath into steam. Winter was here. Christmas was slowly approaching. Green and red decorations were starting to be everywhere. Trees had lost their leaves; birds had left for a warmer place. Days were rapidly passing by without people's consent. At that time of period, everyone looked happy. There were Christmas break, family's reunions, presents... It was joyous. Happiness was everywhere you went.

Luka stared at the grey sky as she buried her hands in her long white coat. She heaved a sigh. Miku was growing weaker. She was sleeping most of the time, she refused to move from her hospital bed and she was rarely speaking to anyone. Luka had decided to take care of her again. They hadn't even talked about what happened once. It wasn't like they were comfortable about doing so. They avoided eye contacts and most of their conversations were ridiculously short. They used to be close, but now they felt so far away from each other. And that painful distance was unbearable. The current situation was confusing and neither of them knew what to do.

The woman looked beside her. At the very least, she had been able to convince Miku to take a walk with her at the park near the hospital. She had been reluctant about doing so at first, but she still had ended up accepting. She needed to get fresh air. It wasn't healthy to always stay lay down on her bed.

The tealette was staring at the ground most of the time, but she would sometimes look up to glance at the couples curiously. They all looked insanely happy. They even saw two guys holding hands. Even though they had been getting some strange looks, it had seemed like they didn't care about what people thought in the slightness. Luka used to be like that too with her exes; she hadn't minded showing affection in public, even going as far as kissing them in front of people. Someone had already told her it was disgraceful, that she should at least hide herself to do such things, but she didn't mind people's opinions. Heterosexual couples didn't need to hide, so why would they?

Luka suddenly felt a hand brush hers. She blinked in surprise at the young girl next to her; her cheeks were a remarkable shade of red.

"M-My hand is cold..." Miku said in an almost quiet murmur.

The pinkette's heart skipped a beat. She understood it was only a reason to be able to hold her hand. She immediately took it in hers and smiled softly at her. It wasn't cold. In fact, it was quite warm, but she decided not to comment on it. She didn't want to ruin the moment.

Luka was concerned about something; Miku didn't receive a single visit ever since she had been hospitalized. She knew there was something wrong with her parents. She wanted to ask, but she didn't even dare starting the conversation about it; she was afraid to make the young girl upset. They had been cruel enough to not bring her to the hospital even though they clearly knew she was sick. They were actually being questioned by policers. They might have been doing it in purpose to treat her at the last minute.

"Miku, about your parents..."

"Luka!"

The young woman froze. She could recognize that voice miles away. Her teeth clenched and her lower lip trembled. It was Miki. Her ex-girlfriend. Honestly, it was the last person she wanted to see. She hesitantly turned around. She didn't change one bit. Dark orange hair, big eyes of the same color, flawless skin... Luka had almost forgotten how pretty she was. It was like a punch in the stomach to see her after what had seemed an eternity. She was about to open her mouth to say something, but was interrupted by a tight hug. It wasn't surprising considering how clingy Miki usually was. "I missed you! I was trying to call you, but you were never answering me." She reproached with an adorable pout.

The pinkette looked away, uncomfortable. She couldn't believe her ex was acting like nothing happened. The reason why they broke up was because Miki had cheated on her with some guy. She had been seeing both him and her at the same time. She would never forgive her such a thing, especially since Luka had loved her deeply. She had stayed heartbroken for several months. It had made her depressed and it had made her lost hope in love. It was like a stab in the heart to see the orange-haired girl cruelly act like nothing happened. She was wearing that smile she had cherished so much in the past. She had always done everything just to be able to see it.

"Miki, get off." She warned her in a cold piercing voice.

The other female instantly pulled away, a shocked and pained expression on her pale face. "I...I'm sorry." She whispered guiltily. She ran her fingers in her long hair and took a deep breath. "I-If only you would know how much I regret what I've done, but I guess you won't forgive me after all... I keep thinking about you, Luka..."

Luka felt a lump forming in her throat. She would be lying if she said she didn't think about her sometimes, but now wasn't the moment to be talking about it. She looked at Miku who was staring elsewhere. She was obviously pretending to be interested in something else. She seemed deep in thought.

"Oh..." Miki's voice shivered as she finally realized the woman wasn't alone. "Your girlfriend?"

The pinkette bit on her lip strongly. She knew this would be coming. It was true that Miku and her ended up kissing once, but as far as she was aware of, they weren't in a relationship.

"She isn't... I don't have anyone like that at the moment..."

She could see obvious relief in Miki's features.

"I'm not seeing anyone either... To be honest, I broke up with him right after you did... I realized that I loved you more than I loved him."

Luka didn't know how to take the news, but it sure shocked her. She had thought Miki would have stayed with him. She had seemed to have a preference over him. They stared at each other a bit uncomfortably.

"You cheated on her?" Miku interrupted them with an unexpected rude voice. She was almost glaring at the woman's ex. "How pitiable. You don't even deserve to be her ex. You're disgusting me." They didn't need to tell her what the situation was about; the tealette had already guessed, and she didn't seem pleased at all.

Miki's eyes widened in shock. Though, she soon put her hands on her hips and looked at Miku with an amused smirk.

"My. Excuse me, who are you to tell me those things? Jealousy isn't cute."

At the word _jealousy_, the tealette flinched. Her expression changed; she seemed confused for a moment, but she soon shook her head. "I just...hate people who cheat on the person they're supposed to like. Luka doesn't deserve that. I'm pretty sure she loved you deeply. You've hurt her to the point of making her think romance is lame." She replied back warily. Having seen many movies and having read many books about romance, the tealette could easily guess what was happening. Her judgment level was pretty high. Every time she had been talking about how great love was, Luka had always seemed pretty uncomfortable, as if something or someone had hurt her in the past.

Miki crossed her arms. She didn't look intimidated. She stared at the pinkette. "Geez, Luka. Who's that girl? She's pretty rude." She told her with a frown.

Luka didn't know how to react. She hadn't expected things to turn out that way; there was an obvious tension between the two girls. "I..." She cleared her dry throat. She didn't want to take anyone's side. She stayed silent, which only made Miku angrier. She stepped away with an annoyed expression.

Miki looked at the tealette's back and heaved a sigh. "I'm sorry, have I just ruined your date?" She asked Luka with a concerned expression.

At the moment, the nurse only wanted to go after Miku, but she knew it would be rude to leave her ex without saying anything. "It wasn't a date." She replied simply and started walking away. "I apologize, but I have to go after her."

Miki stared down. She looked hurt. "Think about what I'm going to say; it's not too late to return back together. I won't do anything stupid anymore... I really love you, Luka, and I promise that I would make you happy, so think about it, alright?"

The young woman didn't say anything. In fact, she pretended she didn't hear anything. There was no way she would return back with her. Not after everything she had done. It was unforgivable. She quickly caught up with Miku and took her arm. She was breathing heavily and coughing drily; running was enough to exhaust her. Luka rubbed her back.

"Miku, you shouldn't run like that."

"I'm fine!" The tealette suddenly shouted as she was gasping for air. "You're just going to forgive her? Even after what she had done to you? You're way too kind. That girl doesn't deserve any pity from you."

Luka was taken aback. Of course she wasn't going to. What made her think she would? She didn't understand. Miku was usually never aggressive. She was always sweet.

"I've never said I would."

"Liar! You were looking at her with such eyes!" The petite girl immediately stopped talking. It looked like she regretted what she had just said. Her angry expression changed into an upset one. "I'm sorry, I'm being childish. My chest stings... It hurts..."

Luka's features instantly softened at her words. Was Miku jealous? It would explain her sudden behavior. She had no idea what the other female was thinking sometimes; she didn't know if she had feelings for her or not, but it really seemed like she did at times.

"If it can reassure you, I'm not going to return back with her. While it's true I once loved her strongly, my feelings for her are completely gone now. You don't have to worry about it."

The tealette gave a nod. She was still trying to catch her breath. "You deserve better than her, anyway. I hope you'll be able to find that one person who will make you happy all your life. You deserve happiness more than anyone else..." She whispered softly to her. Sadness was still evident in her voice.

Luka stared at her with disbelief. She couldn't believe it. They kept hurting each other for nothing. She was pretty sure they were both attracted to each other and Miku had the guts to tell her to be happy with someone else. She decided to abandon. Obviously, the tealette wasn't going to give herself to her and there was nothing she could do. "Let's return you back to the hospital... I don't want you to catch a cold. It could be dangerous with your health." She spoke, disheartened.

Miku shook her head, her long twintails following her gesture.

"I don't want to. Can I go at your house instead? I feel lonely all by myself at the hospital."

Luka knew she shouldn't allow it, but as soon as she heard she was feeling lonely, she hesitantly nodded. The tealette didn't seem sick today, so it should be fine.

"Just for a bit, alright? I won't let you stay the night like last time."

Miku seemed happy with that. A smile parted her lips as she followed her to her house. The woman sighed. She had planned to stay alone tonight, but it seemed like her plan was ruined. It wasn't like she wasn't glad about her patient's company; it was just emotionally exhausting to be around her.

Once they arrived, Luka noticed the door wasn't locked. She growled. She knew it was Lily. It couldn't be anyone else. She entered inside and turned on the light. She immediately froze at the scene; Gumi was lying down on the couch, the blonde on top of her. Lily's hand was in her skirt and she could notice the faint movements of her arm. She was obviously fingering the greenette. Gumi was covered in sweat and her expression showed pure bliss.

"Lily!" Luka snapped. She grabbed the blonde by the hair and pulled her away. She didn't even hesitate before interrupting them. "You could at least go somewhere else to do these kinds of things!"

Her tall friend was quite amused with the situation. She licked her fingers clean suggestively. Gumi's face was a deep shade of red. She sat up and quickly straightened her clothes. She muttered a quick apology to Luka. She didn't even dare looking at her direction. It was obvious she was ashamed.

The pinkette heaved a sigh. She knew it was Lily's fault; she probably dragged Gumi into it. She had thought they had broken up -unless they had gotten back together without her knowing about it. She quickly glanced at the tealette. She was both shocked and embarrassed. It was written all over her face.

"Eh, judging by your expression, I guess it's the first time you see two girls screwing each other." Lily sneered at Miku. "Not too disgusted, are you?"

Luka glared daggers at the blonde, but of course she had to continue;

"Luka likes to lick pussies. You should get used it fast. She's a real beast at bed."

"Lily, that's enough!"

The blonde immediately stopped talking; judging by the tone of voice her friend used, she wasn't going to forgive her that one. In fact, once they would be alone, she was pretty sure she would have a bad time.

"I... um..." Miku murmured, uncomfortable. She obviously didn't know what to say. She was nervously curling up a strand of her hair, avoiding any eye contacts. "I... I'm going to go to the bathroom." She stammered as she hurried away. It was the typical answer people used to get away from a situation they wanted to avoid at all costs.

Luka knew Miku wasn't the kind of person interested in sex. She was more of the romantic type. A knot formed in the pit of her stomach. The situation was making her sickly awkward. She turned to Lily, arms crossed.

"Did you really need to do that?"

"Relax, relax. I just wanted to see her reactions."

"You just wanted to see her reactions!? For God's sake, Miku is as pure as the driven snow!"

The blonde raised an eyebrow. She leaned her back against the wall and examined Luka carefully.

"And are you fine with that? You're more of the physical type than the romantic one, after all. If things ever get heated between you two, are you really going to handle it?"

The pinkette's eyes widened. Things had already gotten heated once; and it had been when they had their first kiss. It had been so intense and passionate. She had already touched her quite intimately; her stomach, her lower back... She had barely been able to restrain herself. She closed her eyes and took a deep, shaking breath. Remembering everything was making her feel a bit hot and bothered. "I... don't know, but I don't think things will go that far." She murmured a bit painfully.

Lily rolled her eyes and sat down next to Gumi, wrapping an arm around her and pulling her close. The greenette still looked pretty uncomfortable. "Anyway, guess what? Gumi and I returned back together." She confessed with a grin.

Luka gave them a smile. She was happy for them, but still there was something she wanted to know.

"What were you two doing in my house in the first place?"

"Well... Gumi was waiting for you to finish work in front of your house. I also came to see you, so her and I talked about stuff and then things got heated fast. She can't resist me when I'm in my uniform."

The pink-haired nurse heaved a sigh. It actually made sense. She took herself a seat and crossed her legs. She told them congratulation. She believed the two of them were meant to be together, despite their personality being so different. They were both looking at each other with loving eyes. Luka knew her talk with Lily had encouraged her to talk with Gumi.

"I've seen Miki..." The woman decided to tell them with an uneasy smile. She soon immediately saw how irritated Lily was with just hearing her name. "She... she said she missed me. She said she wanted us to try being in a relationship again."

"Bullshit!" The blonde suddenly shouted, her fists clenched in anger. "That girl dared to cheat on you. She never loved you properly while you were ready to do everything for her! She's a real-"

"I get it, Lily. I have no intention to return back with her."

"Oh yeah? Just before you decided to take care of the kid, you told me you didn't even know if you were over her."

Luka flinched. It was true that she had been unsure about it, but it wasn't like getting rid of strong feelings you already had for someone was easy in the first place.

"By the way, is the kid still in the bathroom? It takes a while. Is she masturbating or something?"

The pinkette tried to ignore how immature Lily's comment was. She stood up and shot her a glare.

"I'm going to check on her. She might be feeling sick."

Luka quickly went upstairs as she thought about their conversation. She was perfectly certain she didn't feel anything towards Miki anymore. She was holding so much more affection towards Miku. It didn't take a lot of time before she came to like her. She noticed the bathroom's door was open. She looked inside and saw there wasn't any sign of the younger girl. It immediately worried her until she heard a distinct noise in her room. She frowned and silently headed towards it. Her eyes widened at the sight; The tealette was searching in her drawers desperately.

"Miku?"

Miku jumped in surprise and hid something behind her back. She seemed extremely nervous and embarrassed for having been caught. She looked at the floor, her cheeks a deep shade of red.

"I...I was just-"

"What are you hiding?"

Luka's voice had been a bit too stern. She hadn't meant to, especially after seeing Miku's upset expression. She just hated when people rummaged through her things without her permission.

"...Why are you keeping a picture of her?" The tealette inquired quite painfully as she showed the picture she had in her hands.

The young woman's throat tightened as she stared at it. It was Miki. She was doing the peace hand sign with a huge, happy grin on her face. She took a deep breath. She knew she was in quite a delicate situation right now and she couldn't lie to her even if it meant hurting her. She always kept it in her drawers.

"She was once very important to me. She was always happy; she often had a smile on her face. She was quite the cheerful and generous type. When she wanted something, she always made sure she had it. I loved her a lot. I keep dear memories of her. I'm keeping that picture because I... guess she's still kind of important to me even after what she did."

Miku averted her gaze immediately. Luka knew she just hurt her; her face was crisped in pain. She exhaled.

"I'm over her now anyway. Ever since I met you, Miku, I-"

"Why did you kiss me back? Why are you attracted to me? Is it because I'm reminding you of her?" The tealette replied back. It seemed like she was restraining herself not to shout. "Cheerful, happy, adorable... That sounds like me, does it?"

Luka's eyes widened in shock. She had never thought of it that way. While it was true they had some similarities, they were still different.

"I... no, of course not. You two are quite different..."

Miku shook her head. She approached the pinkette and stared right into her crystal blue eyes. She remained silent for a few seconds.

"I'm seriously attracted to you, Luka... I keep thinking about you. You're hunting my dreams. Thinking about the kiss we shared fills me with warm emotions. It makes me feel all hot and... I.. I can't even explain what I'm feeling, but I know for sure that it looks like... _love_..." Miku's voice quivered and it became quiet at the word _love_. She refused to look at her. "But I refuse to let it happen. We'll both get hurt. I accept my death and I don't want you to make me regret it. I've been trying to put distance between us, but you keep coming back. Again and again... I want you to leave me alone..."

Luka was shocked with what just heard. Her heart was pounding into her chest. She could hear it. Her cheeks were a pale pink. She hadn't expected to receive a confession. When Miku saw that the pinkette wasn't going to say anything, she started leaving, only to be restrained by the other female that took her arm and forced her to look at her.

"Why? Don't you think it's the most difficult choice? Isn't it your last wish to fall in love? I can show it to you. I can show you what love is. I might not be the most romantic person, but even if it's just for a short period of time, let me love you, let me make you the happiest girl in the world..."

It sounded so desperate. It was almost heartbreaking. Miku was completely out of breath. She brought a hand to her chest.

"M-My heart is beating fast... If you're not romantic, then I wonder what you are."

They both stared at each other for a long time, before the tealette turned her heels to leave.

"But believe me, this is the worst choice. It's better to take our distance. If we were to make things more serious than they already are, we'll both make my death difficult."

With that, she left.

Luka stared at her back with a broken heart. She was feeling so many things at the same time; happiness, sadness, guilt, regret. She didn't want that. She didn't want them to take their distance. She wanted to spend as much time with her as possible. She refused to let it happen. She quickly followed her, but someone grabbed her arm. She turned around. It was Lily. Judging by her upset expression, it was obvious she had been peeping on them.

"I'll talk with her. You stay here. I'll bring her back to the hospital."

"But Lily I-"

"No buts. Let me do it. You can trust me."

Luka knew Miku wouldn't want to speak to her anyway, so she nodded hesitantly. Lily gave her a reassuring smile and a pat on the shoulder.

"It'll be fine." She told her as she quickly caught up with the tealette.

Once she did, she noticed how sad she seemed to be. It looked like she was about to burst out in tears. She scratched the back of her head.

"Hey, want me to bring you to the hospital? I'll drive you there."

Miku looked up at Lily in surprise. She wasn't really comfortable about being with someone she didn't know, but since she was Luka's friend, it was probably alright. She accepted her suggestion and followed her to her car. From what she could see, the blonde was also a nurse even though she had never seen her until now.

"Are you feeling sick, at the moment?" Lily asked with a frown as she opened the door for her.

"No, not really..."

They both took a seat and attached their belt before the tall woman started the old engine. They stayed silent until Lily decided to break it. She hoped not to make things uncomfortable with Miku. After what she had heard, she seemed pretty serious about Luka.

"Do you really think putting distance between you two is the best solution?"

The tealette was surprised. She stared at the blonde with a frown. She didn't really like that she listened to them. She crossed her arms and looked away.

"I don't want to talk about this now..."

"Don't be like that. I'm just trying to help you two. You know what Luka told me once? She said something like 'if Miku ever falls for me, I'll show her the most wonderful moments she would ever have'." Lily explained as she tried imitating her friend's voice. She sneered. "I tried to stop her, but then she said 'I've helplessly fallen in love with her and there's nothing you can do'. She's such a stubborn woman, but she has a great heart. You'll never ever meet anyone else like her." She spoke with deep affection in her voice.

Miku played with one of her twintails. Did Luka really say that? She felt a sudden warm invade her whole body. She took a shaky breath. Everything was confusing. She wanted to give herself to the pinkette, she really did, but what would be the point of doing so anyway? They would both end up suffer deeply. She closed her eyes. She was about to say something, but then Lily continued,

"She used to say her ex was the love of her life. I guess she did love her a lot, but she never looked at her the way she's looking at you. Her eyes are always filled with deep tenderness and love. You're the only thing she's thinking about."

"Really...?" Miku's breath was caught in her throat. Her heart was beating as fast as it could. She felt like it was going to explode in her chest. Her face was flushed. She knew Luka was attracted to her, but she had no idea it was that much. She bit on her lower lip strongly.

"Yeah, she freaking loves you. I thought it was stupid, cause you two just met about a month ago. I thought it was crazy. I refused to let it happen. I didn't want her to get hurt again, but I've been stupid to think so. The distance you're putting between you two is making her suffer more than you think."

Miku lowered her head and clenched her fists. "I... I know that already..." She murmured with a shaky voice.

"If you know it, then stop torturing her. You've freaking kissed her. You've made her want for more." Lily growled, gripping the stirring wheel. She was trying to restrain her sudden anger. "You're as stubborn as Luka, eh? Let me ask you something; are you even into girls? Luka is gay. She won't just satisfy herself with hugs and kisses, if you know what I mean."

Miku's cheeks were now burning red. She knew perfectly what it meant. She scratched her nose sheepishly. "G-Gender never really mattered to me when it's about romance..." She admitted almost silently.

"Bullshit. It's still supposed to matter in a way. Do you think Luka is attractive? Do you think you could touch her sexually? What do you think?"

"That's-" Miku trailed off. It was so embarrassing. She clenched the hem of her skirt. "I...I did think about it once, alright?"

Lily blinked. She hadn't expected that. She then laughed and smirked at her.

"How did it make you feel?"

"D-Do you really need to know that...?" The young girl mumbled. It did make her feel hot, but she wasn't going to admit it.

"Sorry, sorry. Just keep in mind that Luka really loves you. She's serious about you. Think about the decision you're going to make."

Miku didn't say anything. She stared at the window as they finally arrived in front of the hospital. She seemed focused on her thoughts.

"How many exes does Luka have?"

Lily blinked in surprise. It was a bit unexpected. She chuckled.

"You'll have to ask her, dear. Not giving you the answer. Why? Does it bother you?"

The tealette heaved a sigh. She had really wanted to know and she highly doubted she would have enough courage to ask her. She got out of the car. Before closing the door, she looked at Luka's friend.

"Thanks for the talk. I really needed it."

Lily grinned at her and nodded. She really hoped it made Miku change her mind. Even if she knew they would both get insanely hurt at the end, they would at least still share some moments of happiness.

**oOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo**

_Let's go on a date together tomorrow!_

Luka stared at her message text with a grimace. It was Miki. She hadn't erased her from her contacts, but she should have done it. She dismissed the text and looked at the hour. She was almost done with work already. As usual, she barely got enough sleep because of what happened with Miku, so she just wanted to go home and get some rest. She hadn't visited her today. She didn't have the courage to even though she knew she should. She couldn't let things the way they were. She needed to do something. Lily had refused to tell her anything about the conversation they had. Needless to say that it worried her a lot.

She passed next to the tealette's door. Should she see her? She pursed her lips strongly. Her heart was beating from nervousness as she decided to take the doorknob. Her hands were trembling. She needed to do this. She opened it with an indiscreet crack sound and met with fatigued teal eyes. She looked exhausted.

"Are... are you okay?"

Miku gave a lazy nod and a weak smile.

"Yeah. I'm just tired and I might be having a bit of fever, but I'm alright." She told her with confidence. She licked her dry lips. "I... I thought you wouldn't come."

Luka approached her and touched her forehead. It was burning. "You're not just having a bit of fever. Let me take your temperature. Do you have convulsions? Hallucination?" She decided to ask as she put the thermometer in her mouth. The girl shook her head. Once the result was shown, she looked at it. It was quite high, but not enough to be dangerous. "Wait here, I'll search for pills. We have to heal it before it gets higher."

Miku grimaced and sat up with a groan. She then held her head in pain.

"L-Luka...?"

Luka was about to leave when she heard her name. She opened her mouth to say something, but she suddenly felt arms wrap around her. She was being hugged from behind. She could feel Miku's head against her back. Her heart skipped a beat.

"M-Miku, you need to lay down. Your fever is-"

"Make me happy, Luka..." She spoke in a wavering voice as she tightened the hug. "Make me happy... Show me great moments..."

The pinkette's eye widened. Did it mean Miku changed her mind? Did it mean she wanted her to become her lover and make her happy until the end of her days? She pushed her away from the hug to look into her eyes. They were filled with both sadness and happiness. Luka smiled lovingly at her.

"I'll make you happy, I promise."

The woman didn't expect her to kiss her soon after she said it, and yet it happened; her back leaned against the wall as Miku eagerly closed the frustrating gape between their bodies. Luka immediately moaned in anticipation. Both the younger girl's lips and breath were hot and she understood it was because of her fever, but she didn't mind in the slightness. She had been wanting for that moment to happen again since what had seemed an eternity. She wasn't going to restrain herself. She could feel Miku's heart beating as fast as hers. She could feel her small chest pressing against her stomach.

"Luka..." Miku breathed out desperately between heated kisses.

The pinkette felt electrifying shivers traveling up her body. She needed so much more. She pushed her tongue inside her mouth as she wrapped an arm around her waist, trying pull her even closer. She was starting to feel dizzy from both the mind-blowing emotions and the lack of breathing, but she refused to stop. She could feel Miku's eager hands caress her back, her side, her hips. Her breath hitched. She was scratching gently with her nails, giving way to a guilty and pleasurable feeling.

Before it went too far, Luka pushed her away, before pulling ther back into her arms. They were both breathing heavily. They remained silent for a long time, enjoying the other's warmth.

And then, a smile parted Luka's lips.

"You've made the right choice. I'll make your last days the most enjoyable ones. It's a promise."

* * *

**A/N:** 2 or 3 more chapters before the end. I'll continue The New Student after I finished this story.

Review please?


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